I remember driving up the wooded path to home. As usual, my mind was on auto pilot. Thoughts bounced within my mind. Thoughts of that blue haired whore, Tommy and his warning against instigating a fight with the Master. Most prominent was the slow debilitation of the already frayed grip on sanity and humanity. It wasn't until I stepped out of the car, in the mere seconds before the ritual that paralyzed me, that I sensed the presence of hostile Kindred. Not even enough time to place a call of rescue to Tommy, Simon...any of my allies. Not like I would.
"Sweet redemption just in front of me."
I knew I would die before the attacks started coming in earnest. The pain didn't phase me, and strange enough the fear didn't either. At first. Perhaps this will be my release. Finally, what I sought since my maker tore me from my home and started my tortuous journey into the world of darkness. I felt as if I was coming to terms with all the pain of my sixty plus years. Freedom, if forced freedom. Maybe this is the only was I could reach it..
"Well now, it seems once again that I've lost another
One of the ones that have broke through the wall."
Things were calm after it was over. Seeing through unveiled eyes, death didn't seem nearly as frightening as I expected. Where is the hell and torment I've undoubtedly earned? I don't know where I am. It's quiet, out and inside of my head. Surprising, yet I remain unalarmed. My back is free of my chainsaws comforting weight. There's no hunting knife nestled snugly in my boot. My feet are bare. The cream colored dress that adorns me is clean. Clear of the usual gore and bloodstains. I feel at ease, despite my lack of weaponry. Is it possible? Have I come upon a version of...heaven? A light breeze picks up and carries with it a recognizable scent. I glance ahead and smile. "Hello, darlin'." Law, the foreboding, yet kindhearted tiger who took me in and loved me despite my insanity. The one I left when I realized I couldn't return his affections. He holds his arms out, beckoning me to him. Without hesitation I run into his embrace. He picks me up without effort, swinging me in a circle. I let out unfamiliar, joyous laughter. His gold eyes stare up at me with the love I never could accept, and for once, I don't shy away from it. He sets me down with a smile. Law's hand graze the side of my face gently, and I feel his lips press upon my forehead in a kiss. "Missed you, Mad." I hold my hand against his. "I missed you too, Law." My words are sincere. "Law, I'm sor.." Placing a finger to my lips he silences me. "Shh. It isn't about me, darlin'" He points behind me. "Someone else is here to see you." Curious, I follow the line of his gesture and set eyes on...
The Gangrel lets out a grunt as I leap upon him. His laughter is music to my ears as I bury my face in his tan trench coat, inhaling his scent, sighing when I feel his lips brushing kisses into my hair. "Maddie." I can hear the smile in Mongrel's voice. When I finally meet his eyes, they're filled with crimson tinged tears. "Mongrel. My Mongrel. I've been so lost without you." Speaking the words aloud don't bring me the sorrow I expect. My own eyes spill over with tears, but they're clean, human tears of bliss. Mongrel cradles my face in between his hands, his lips grazing my brow, the bridge of my nose. Meeting my lips in a long mislaid kiss. I run my fingertips across his face, re-familiarizing myself with the contours of his visage. Lips breaking from mine, Mongrel smiles. It's the genuine, loving smile I crave. "You're always in my heart, Maddie. I love you." Without trepidation or hesitation, I reply. "I love you, Mongrel." I hear a low murmur from behind us. Glancing over his shoulder, I see the unbreakable mountain of a Brujah, and the wiry, lithe Lasombra. I switch my gaze back to Mongrel, not wanting to walk away from his arms. He pets my hair, still smiling. "Go, deary. They're here for you."
I approach Pyotr, unafraid despite the impassive look on his face. I give him the charming, appeasing look that always won the towering Brujah over. He pulls me into a firm hug, lifting me off my feet. His voice is warm, the thick Russian accent enhancing his words. "Madelyn, my daughter. Such a little firebrand." Our laughter melds together. His deep and booming, my own light and soft. A purposeful clearing of the throat makes me turn around. Tybalt faces me with his trademark raised eyebrow. I grin and wrap my arms around him. "Still my favorite Malkavian." he says with a smirk. "Damn, right." I reply, matter-of-factly. Tybalt gently pushes me towards what appears to be an awaiting throng of Kindred. "All for you, Maddie." I walk past all my friends and allies. Marcus squeezes my shoulder as I pass. I hug Lucy, smiling at the Toreador as she kisses my cheek. I return Fate's mischievous grin as she high fives me with a shadow arm. Magnus gives me a respectful nod. Passing Tommy, he takes my hand, bringing it to his lips and kissing the knuckles. "Lady Malkavian." All of those who were tethers in my un-life. The ones that helped my sanity from slipping completely. If this is how everything comes to an end...
I smile a genuine smile, feeling the long lost emotions I constantly struggled to fight off. I close my eyes for the briefest of moments, savoring it. There's a disconcerting lurch in my subconscious, and I open my eyes to a taste of the horror I expected. An escaped whimper of fear when I see what replaces my pseudo heaven.
"Damned
Fate won't compromise
I have sold my soul, and now the devil's laughing."
A dead, mouldering world seemed superimposed over the one I came to know. Ghostly figures and unknown shapes attempt to accost me, shrieking for penance I can't offer. I shrink back from each grasping, clutching hand. They want me, they want my soul...they want my everything. I'm running in the familiar, yet terrifyingly altered streets. The sound of my feet slapping the concrete doesn't drown out the phantasmal moaning. They need me. No. They can't have me. Even dead, beaten and defeated, I'm not submitting. Without a conscious decision, I head in a set direction. There's something I'm here to do. I repeat the words like a mantra to block out the voices. A well practiced routine.
"You were bold and strong, and ready to begin your life.
All for nothing, you were sacrificed
You began alone, and so it will be when you die
All for nothing, will you be remembered?
You did decide."
I don't know where I've ended up, but everything in my being let's me know I'm were I need to be. It's a secluded house. Older, but with a sense of luxury that's almost unexpected. While I don't recognize the building, the setting itself is familiar. A momentary skip in reality and I'm in the house. There's a figure hunched over a writing desk. I haven't set eyes on the corporeal version of this figure for so long that I'm too take aback to feel joy or sorrow. I silently circle around, and see the recognizable blond mane falling over those sad yellow eyes. Things seem to fall into place. I'm dead. Still dead. Actually dead. This is my...after. No extensive torture, yet no peace. I look down at the Gangrel. He's sketching, just like he used to. He was away for so long and here he is, just like yesterday. I watch him intently. I wonder. I take a few steps forward. There is no audible sound from my movement, not even a displacement of air. He probably wouldn't even notice me unless I...
"Mongrel."
